Thursday, August 16, 2012

slowing down for the sake of staying sane

The weeks following a family funeral, and I feel normal again, whole again.  The grieving still hits sometimes when I tell his story, my breath gets caught in the middle of my throat and I have to stop.  Stop talking and stop walking.  Like a moment of silence that is requested to remember someone who has passed. 

But we’re home again, our four again, with projects that had to be postponed, our To Do List ever growing, but it really is acceptable now.  We do what we are able to, in our time allotted, if we take on too much our quality of life dwindles and we don’t relish time together.  Instead we think of what else we need to take care of.  And there is such peace to be found in that.  I feel like I’ve discovered my philosophers stone of patience.  I’m sure it will wane as the new school year begins with its challenges of a new transition and schedule for each of us, but I can only hope to hold it close right now, cherish it and tend to it.  And trust that glimpses of it will pop up at the times when it’s most needed.

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